Sunday, January 1, 2012

2011 Wrap Up.

Sunday Stealing: The 2011 Year End Meme

Thanks to the Mayans, assholes everywhere will be
looking forward to this...

1. What did you do in 2011 that you’d never done before?
Had a nervous breakdown (Who am I kidding?  It wasn't the first, just the worst).

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I don't make resolutions.  The day after Christmas after a spectacularly bad pig-out and subsequent stomach ache, I decided to cut dairy out for a while to see how I feel.  I didn't wait until the 1st.  I just fucking did it.  And I am going with it for now.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Um no.  Lila's too young and Ben can't actually do that.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

5. What countries did you visit?
CrazyLand and Psychozykstan

6. What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?
Money, patience, a sex drive and superpowers.  Is that asking so much?

7. What dates from 2011 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
October 25th.  Just picked that one.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Having over 200 followers on Facebook.  If you aim low, you won't be disappointed. 

I hope to have this option on the Because Motherhood Sucks
Facebook page soon.

9. What was your biggest failure?
I am pretty much in the same place I was last year at this time.  That sucks.

10. What was the best thing you bought?
HANDS DOWN, my Kindle Fire.  I LOVE it.

11. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Listen, I didn't strangle anyone or abuse anyone or drop anyone (you know who you are) off at the orphanage.  I deserve SOME kind of acknowledgement for that.

12. Whose behavior made you appalled and disgusted?
Mine?  Lilas at times.  Bens.  Also Congress, Bank CEOs, and as always, the cast of Jersey Shore.

LOOK, Italy!  It's a DOUCHE PARADE!!!

13. What song will always remind you of 2011?
That god-damned "Moves Like Jagger" abomination.  DAMMIT!  Just thinking of it got it stuck in my head for the next 12 hours.

14. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Sex.  Getting blackout drunk.  Destroying my enemies.  Blogging. 

15. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Yelling at my kid.  My throat was sore a lot.  But seriously, she practically begs me to do it.  Not literally, of course.  But by being a dick half of the time.

16. Did you fall in love in 2011?
Yes, with my happy pills.

17. What was your favorite new TV program?
Well, I decided to watch Fringe from the beginning this year.  HOLY SHIT why didn't anyone tell me it was so f**king awesome?  So although it's old, it's new to me. 

18. What was the best book you read?
The Illumination by Kevin Brockmeier.  I was hoping it would be Escape from Intimacy, but I realized a few chapters in that it WAS NOT a "how-to".

9. What one thing would have made your year measurably more satisfying?
See # 14.  That and a lobotomy.

20. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?
Frumpy.  And old lady-ish.  I am working on that though.

21. What kept you sane?
Hahahahahaha.  Nothing.  That's why I was in the nut house.

22. Who did you miss?
A certain ex boyfriend who I always miss.  Sorry but it's true.

23. Who was the best new person you met?
There's this hot new security guard at work.  He's my pretend work husband.

24. Tell us a valuable lesson you learned in 2011?
If you start to believe you are going crazy, check yourself into the psych ward.  It will give you perspective.  Also, there's nothing pharmaceuticals can't fix.

25. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

"Nobody told me there'd be days like these
Nobody told me there'd be days like these
Nobody told me there'd be days like these
Strange days indeed
most peculiar Mama."


  1. So, I totally thought your song lyric was going to be "I've got the moves like Jagger, the moves like Jagger, the moo-ooo-oooves like Jagger."

    *ducks for cover* Don't hate me. ;)

    And I'm surprised we didn't run into each other in CrazyLand, I frequented that place often this past year. If you're there again, look for me. I'll be the one dressed as Mrs. Nesbitt sucking down darjeeling with Marie Antoinette... and her little sister.

    If you get that reference you will be my best friend forever!

    Happy New Year! :)

  2. I really hate looking back at the prior year and thinking "friggin A!" What a waste. Heres to better things, and moving forward. :)

  3. Moves like Jagger in my head now. Thanks a lot. Ugh. :) Happy New Year to you! Have fun with the work husband!!

  4. fyi oct 25 is my birthday...aka day of awesomeness :)

  5. Kristy: Moves Like Jagger will destroy your life!!!

    Bart: I am ready to commit to not being totally miserable at the end of next year. I am going to start by resolving to drink more.

    SweenZ:Oct 25th is kind of a sad day for me, but this past year was pretty great. So yes, I officially recast Oct 25th as my DAY OF AWESOMENESS this year.


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