Thursday, July 21, 2011

DRIVING me crazy

There are hundreds of things I miss from my pre-Mommy days.  I miss my body.  I miss making spontaneous plans.  I miss being able to leave the house without 2 hours of preparation and planning.  But there is one thing that I am reminded of nearly every single day, and every day I miss it more and more.

I miss being able to zone out and think while driving. 

Have you ever tried to concentrate on the road in a construction area where there is no shoulder and cars are merging in front and behind you with a 4 year old in the back seat?  Do you have any idea how nerve racking that is?

Actual conversation that took place in heavy traffic yesterday:

Kid: Mommy, what day is it?
Me: It's Tuesday. 
Kid: Is it Tuesday?
Me: Yes.  Today is Tuesday.
Kid: I think it's Wednesday. 
Me: No.  It's Tuesday.  Trust me.
Kid: Is it going to be Thursday tomorrow? 
Me:  No.  It's going to be Wednesday because today is Tuesday.
Kid: No it isn't Tuesday, it's Wednesday.
Me:  Ok... Then you're right.
Kid: Is tomorrow Friday or Thursday. 
Me: Tomorrow will be WEDNESDAY.
Kid: No tomorrow isn't Wednesday. 
Me: Yes it is.
Kid: Today is Wednesday. 
Me: No it isn't.
Kid: It's Wednesday and tomorrow is Thursday.
Me: OK.  Let's play a game and see who can be quiet longer!
(6 seconds go by)
Kid: Mommy, what day is today?
I have begged for quiet.  I have tried to make a game of it.  I have turned up the music to drown her out (which just makes her scream that it's too loud and that she has a headache).  I have explained that Mommy needs to concentrate and just needs to not have to answer any more questions while I am driving.  Nothing works.

What makes it worse is that she also constantly critiques my driving.
Why are you going so slow? 
Why did you hit that bump? 
Are we going to crash? 
Why don't you go around that guy? 
I should be thankful that she is so curious about the world. I should be glad that she feels she can talk to me. Because I know that before I know it there will be slammed bedroom doors and refusals to listen. But JESUS CHRIST, can I just have a few quiet minutes in the car when I need it???


  1. Ohh I can totally relate. I love my daughter to pieces, but some days she yammers on and on, and I just want to tell her to Shut It.

  2. Your daughter sounds exactly like my grandfather, proving once again my theory that youth and elderly are actually the exact same stage of life in different shaped bodies.

  3. My 5yr old does the same thing! Not that long ago as I am driving him to his Nana's for a "spendover" I told him, "enough, I need you to be quite for like 2 minutes so I can think" the car was slient and I didn't realize it until about 1 minute in. I was shocked then he said "I am being a good listener, huh mama?" I said yes and let him speak. I felt bad and it was odd to be in the car and not hear anything (knowing he was with me).

  4. The car conversations are riveting, aren't they? Really snappy banter is how it can be described. Are we going over train tracks? Where are the train tracks? Why are we going over them? Is that train moving? Why is it stopped? Is it moving now? Why?

  5. The short answer to your question is "no." Good luck.

  6. AWESOME!!! I remember these convos with my own kids when they were that age. I used to bribe the Kroger checkers to give my kids extra stickers, then they'd put them over their mouths. I called it, "Whoever talks first is a big fat loser".

    Man, I miss those days.

  7. So, is it bad that I will tell my kid to "SHUT UP" in that loud scary voice? And if he doesn't I keep saying it to him until he does? Granted, my kid is older now so he completely knows to shut the hell up...but keeps talking anyways now only 30% of the time. He's learning...

    It should get a wee bit easier once she's older, because you can explain and they can understand and you'll have more than a 50/50 shot of them listening...

  8. I never thought about asking her to put the stickers over her mouth. You should see the window next to her car seat!

  9. Oh boy. I can relate. I CAN. My son is 3. We're going through the "why" phase. I think I might hurt myself if this lasts much longer.

  10. I swear I had the exact same conversation with my son, only it was about how 20+20=40 and him insisting 21+21=41, and no matter what I said in the car, nothing could shake his conviction.

    Not only can I not zone out, I am constantly handing back snacks to my Lil Diva, who is now joining my son in the bid for attention while driving.

    I so get it.

  11. I really like you! I am sitting here in the basement with my three young children. As you can imagine, it is noisy, and I can't go upstairs because they will follow me...I feel (excuse me, I am) depressed. I feel lifeless. I try real hard just like you, but this depression keeps getting to me. I decided while in the company of my children to see what comes up when I type "motherhood sucks"...Tadaa! Your blog. It comforts me to know that I am not alone. While I love my children more than anything and anyone, I lose myself easily. I look forward to reading your blogs. Wish I had the talent you have for writing. I wish for you to overcome this awful depression and to enjoy your life!


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