Monday, April 4, 2011

More Trauma by Poop

Jesus Christ.  My kid is terrified of pooping. 

No really.

She is still refusing to poop on the toilet and is really freaked out now about going in a pull up.  EVERYONE has assured me that I should just LET HER and that she will decide when she's ready to try the toilet.
(Many of you know that several months ago I wrote about her fear of pooping on the toilet.  If you haven't read it, click here)

I've read her the books.  I have ignored it and attempted to let her "come around herself" (for almost a full year now).  I have pleaded and tried to bargain with rewards and bribe with fantastic gifts.  I have done breathing exercises with her on the toilet.  I have let her "read" for an hour in the bathroom.  She will NOT let a number two loose on the toilet.

Recently, it occurred to me that she may be actually phobic of it.  She panics when she feels it coming.  She gets scared.  She even tries to get me not to take her pull-up off because she is afraid she (in her words) "made a bad poop".  My mother believes that I have convinced her that pooping is bad because she is so afraid of being cleaned up after going in a pull-up.  I assure you, I do nothing but tell her how normal it is.

And after today, I am convinced that she will never shit again.

Lila spent the day at my mother's house while I was at work today and apparently complained much of the day that her belly hurt her.  She told my mother that she needed to put a pull up on and as always my mother complied.  A few minutes later, Lila was no where to be found.  My mother found her playing with a flashlight in her closet (the smell was overwhelming) and told her that it was time to come out and get changed.  Lila started to panic. 

When she tried to put her down, Lila arched her back and started screaming.

Lila told her it was "a really big poop" and my mother assured her it was okay.  Lila told her it was really messy, and my mother told her it wasn't a big deal and she would just clean it up.  Lila told her she didn't want to lie down to get changed but my mother insisted because Lila is ALWAYS freaked out by pooping.  Lila immediately started screaming that there was poop on her.  My mother then realized that there was literally a SHIT LOAD of diarrhea and it was coming out of Lila's pull up and all up the back of her.  Up her back, and into her fucking hair (how did she not realize this?  I don't know...she's old).

Lila was completely fucking freaking out. 

When Ben showed up to get Lila, she was in the bathtub crying and freaking because there was now poop in the bathtub (I have no idea why my mother didnt just shower her...but whatever). 

After getting her dried up and dressed, Ben took her home and gave her a good bath with shampoo and bubbles and all that.  She was fine.  Like nothing ever happened.

Until she thought she had to poop again.  She freaked out.  She had a pull up on and suddenly remembered and asked me, "am I going to have diarrhea again?"  I said, "I don't know, Lila.  But it's okay.  Let's see." 

She freaked and told me she didn't have to go anymore.  I tried to talk to her but she got all uptight ant weird so we let it go. 

At bedtime, she told me she needed a pull up.  I put it on her and we waited.  She got really freaked out again when she started to feel like it was coming.  Then she told me she just peed a little and she was not going to poop tonight.  I knew from the smell that she hadn't peed.  And that she still has diarrhea and was now trying to hold it.  "This is going to be AWESOME tonight when she wakes up covered in shit," I thought.  But she refused to try to go more.

So what the hell do you do with a kid who is shit-phobic?  Seriously?

All images courtesy of Google Image Search. 


  1. People will say this is not uncommon. But there are no tried and true methods of curing the fear. I think she really will figure it all out in her own time, but I know that doesn't make it any easier for anyone concerned. Can you do diaper changes with her standing up? What about 'running out of pull ups'? I had a regresser…fully toilet-trained for over a year and suddenly started crapping his pants multiple times a day. Lasted for 3 months until I instituted the chocolate chip bribes.

    I send you both my very best wishes with this :)

  2. OH man. This sucks. Sorry. My best friends son (2.5 years old) had a similar poop fear, but worse; he would only go like once every two weeks. They ended up in the ER for a few days so they could "clean him out" all proper like. Now they give him Miralax every day to keep the poop soft (evidently his fear stems from one hellish "hard" poop) Now that his poop is soft and he goes everyday, he's golden. It was a rough 6 or so months though. My two year old wants nothing to do with toilet training so unfortunately I have no first hand advice :/

  3. Perhaps this goes into why she doesn't want to eat either? Eat = poop = bad? *shrug*

  4. Oh, man. All I can say is everyone is freaking me out about potty training lately. That only helps you in the sense of knowing it isn't just you, but unfortunately that also means I have no advice to offer you. :(

  5. My son was afraid because it hurt. He was on Miralax for two years. At first he would only use a diaper. I wish I could remember how I got him onto the toilet. I'm sure it was a bribe. He loves candy more than anything. Now my daughter is almost 3 and will only use a diaper or pull up. Bribes have not worked so far. I'm trying to be patient about it. Bribes have not worked so far. Can't anything be easy with kids???

  6. Wow. I feel lucky. My oldest didn't have too much trouble when it came to using the toilet. In fact after his mother got him trained up, I was invited to see the "good work" he did. I out loud exclaimed that he left a monster turd in the toilet (it was the size of a small pickup I swear). After that he would wake me up letting me know that A) he left a monster turd in the toilet that I need to come be proud of and B) his butt itches (code for 'I dont know how to wipe yet, come do it for me).

    My youngest learned the art of peeing from our cat. And subsequently began his non peeing in a diaper days by walking over to the cat box, whipping it out and marking the catbox as his own. We eventually, much to the pleasure of the cat I'm sure, got him to use the toilet like Daddy does. Pooping on the other hand took a little more coaxing, and he required the newspaper, because that was what Daddy did. Eventually he figured it out. However, he felt the need to strip down completely for either transaction, and return to his previous activities without clothes. Which was quite a surprise for a few babysitters who found him back in the living room playing with megablocks, sans clothing. I guess he decided that like making a bed, what's the point when you're just gonna take them off again anyways.


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